"This will be a challenge" I thought.
I started by sorting through each item and putting them into piles in our living room. I created a pile for dresses, t-shirts, dress shirts, sweaters, zip-up and cardigan sweaters, work-out pants/capris, dress pants/capris, and a final pile for maternity clothes. The whole living room was full of piles. I'm still not positive I found everything. In fact, I know I haven't. I know I'm missing three pairs of maternity pants somewhere in the house, which means there is bound to be a few articles of clothinglost somewhere in the house.
Sorting through clothes was difficult. I am going to guess that giving away clothes is going to be one of the hardest parts of this journey. I recently listened to a book called Faster Than Normal by Peter Shankman. He talked about how we often hold onto things because it is a reminder of who we wanted to be. I think that is what a lot of my clothes are for me.
I've had a love and hate relationship with clothes most of my life. When I was younger (around late elementary school through middle school) I found clothes playing a big role in forming relationships. When I first transferred to public school, I was asked why I didn't dress with jeans and name brand t-shirts. I explained that I just liked to be comfortable and wanted friends that would accept me for who I was, not what I wore. I remember being somewhat carefree about such things then. Even in high school I wore comfortable dress pants (I always preferred dress pants over jeans) and a sweatshirt nearly every day of school.
However, in college is where I hit my turning point. I wanted to fit in so badly with a group of other music ed majors and a few of them commented several times about how they wanted to give me a make over. It would make me so angry because I didn't NEED a make over. I knew how to dress fashionably and how to do make-up. I didn't actually NEED anyone's help to follow the "rules" of society. I chose not to. That year is when I started obsessing about what I wore to prove that I knew how to dress and didn't need their help. That is when I started focusing on each item in my closet and making sure I had the "best".
Since my early twenties, I have continued to select styles that I know are on trend and look polished. This has resulted in a wide array of clothing that hardly ever gets worn and overwhelms me with choices each morning. I can't tell you how many days I have put on pants and wondered what shirt goes with them. Then I select a shirt to wear and that one doesn't make me feel like I look good, so I go and select a different shirt. Then that shirt fits, but now I need to pick the right accessories. It is exhausting and I end up running around like a chicken with my head cut off. Lots of time wasted...
To begin eliminating this problem I created these "rules" when choosing what to keep and what to donate:
- It has to fit NOW. Not if I lose a few pounds... Not when I gain a few pounds... Not during a specific season... NOW.
- It has to be good quality with no current holes, stains, rips, etc.
- It has to be versatile
- It can be worn at work, church, and running errands
- You'll also notice when you see what I selected that I tried to go with a color scheme of sorts. This allows for more mix and match options without much thought and effort.
My original goal was to get down to 30 items, which is recommended for a minimalist wardrobe. However, when I actually counted all the clothes I started with I decided that there was no way I could get to only 30 items over night. So, I decided to start by getting rid of at least 50% of items from each category.
I started sorting through shirts and thought about which ones I tend to grab. Don't we all have things in our closet that we automatically reach for? Don't we all have favorites that we wear over and over again? Why do we hold on to all the items that sit in the back of our drawer or closet?
I reflected to Adam that night about how so many items in my closet were never worn. Even if others told me they looked great on me, I never wore them. Some of these items my friends and family told me looked great on me, but I still did not wear them. Why don't I wear them? Obviously there is something I don't like about it. So, I finally let it go. I'm done wearing things for other people. (Note: I am not insinuating in any way that my friends or family were trying to force me to be someone other than myself. My friends and family truly do accept me for me, they were just complementing me. It is nice to give complements, but it is also ok to do what you want with your wardrobe regardless of others thoughts or opinions.)
Skirts and dresses were pretty easy. I was even able to wear all the dresses during pregnancy!
I limited t-shirts to 9. That is still too many when you think about how often you do laundry and the fact that I could work out every day and still have a few left, but it was the best I could do for now
Pants were the hardest. Once upon a time I was skinny. Skinnier than I ever remember being. I felt so good about myself and had so much energy. It came with a lot of work and a lot of effort. I still held on to all of the pants that fit when I was 20 pounds lighter. I also had all the pants from the time I was 20 pounds heavier than I am now. I've never been able to part with pants. I've always worried that I'll gain the weight back and need new pants. I hate buying new pants... However, I decided with this journey I'm letting go of the past. One day I will get back to that size. I know I will, but for now I need to be happy with who I AM. Even after having a baby I'm 20 pounds lighter than and more in shape than I was before getting married. I got rid of every pair of pants that did not fit. If I lose more weight, I can always reward myself with new pants and keeping my "fat pants" only makes me hold onto the negative self talk that drives me back. I'm embracing the body I have. P.S. You should too!
My final breakdown of clothing:
Now everything for Summer-Winter fits in my dresser drawers without stuffing! It is amazing. I apologize I don't have before shots of my drawers. I'll try to do better with including before shots from now on.
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